All Products
Est. 1997
CARPETS
Pets for your car. Now in 3 breeds.
The world's first automotive companion animal. Choose from Shagpile, Persian, or Labrador. They don't fetch, but they don't shed either.
View Product → Est. 1997
The Tragic 8 Ball
Ask it anything. Regret everything.
Like a Magic 8 Ball, but it's been through some stuff. Every answer is technically correct — just deeply unhelpful. Crushing dreams since 1997.
View Product → Est. 2001
The Magic Hate Ball
It has opinions. All hostile.
The angry sibling of the Tragic 8 Ball. Shake it at your own risk. Its opinions are its own (though privately we agree with most of them).
View Product → Est. 2024
Hay Eye Companions
The original smart speaker.
AI companions are expensive. Hay bales with googly eyes are not. Stand in a field and talk to one. They listen. They never judge. They are hay.
View Product → Est. 2001
Soup of the Night
When regular soup just isn't enough.
The sultry, darker opposite of Soup of the Day. Late-night soup with mood lighting, saxophone energy, and wine pairings for canned soup. Open after 10pm.
View Product → Est. 2024
Stranger's Things
Turned Upside Down. Lifted From Pockets.
HotSquatch heard Stranger Things was popular. He did not understand it. But he wanted in. A five-piece collector's set of items liberated from the pockets of complete strangers.
View Product → Est. 1957
Pillow Fridge
Sleep Cool™
Why flip when you can chill? The Pillow Fridge uses industrial Freon-based cooling technology to deliver continuous refrigerated comfort directly to your head. 240V outlet required.
View Product → Est. 2003
Grocery Gnomes
Professional grocery chaos agents.
Hire gnomes to rearrange aisles, wipe shopper memories, and transform grocery shopping into an adventure. Memory wiping and weekly shuffling included.
View Product → Est. 2019
Mosquito Teleportation Device
Never get swatted again.
Revolutionary teleportation technology for mosquitoes. Instant escape with 10-second invisibility. Warning: side effects include blood cravings.
View Product →
Est. 2024
HotSquatch! 2026
12 months of Sasquatch. 0 months of shame.
The tasteful(?) Bigfoot pinup calendar you didn't know you needed. Banned in 4 national parks. Only $19.99. Operators are standing by.
View Product →Awards & Recognition
Best in Show
Pensacola County Fair, 2003 (Livestock category, by accident)
Most Likely to Exist
Better Business-ish Bureau, 2024
Certificate of Participation
Delaware Annual Business Filing, every year since 1997
3rd Place
Regional Innovation Award (only 3 entries)
Honorable Mention
Sasquatch Entrepreneurs Quarterly, "Most Ethical Use of Bigfoot" 2019
Five Stars
From our mom. She's very proud of us.